May 13, 2009

Orlando is grateful...

• that you buyed me that dinosaur

• seeing Ralphie and playing

• running in the park

• eating that delicious meal in the restaurant

• and the last thing is being here right now with you in the bed. I love you.

Mica is grateful for...

• seeing all the cousins… Ralphie and Felix and their mama, and my mama

Stacy says...

Today I woke up, tangled in the kids, and already had that feeling, "I don’t want to be here." It's not about the kids and it's not even about me, maybe, but the feeling persisted. I spent the morning running away in all kinds of subtle ways: "I'll fix that later." "Just a few more minutes." "One more phone call." It went on too long, and the kids began to whine, and pull… and still I stayed distant.

But I am thankful anyway, because the distance went just far enough and my observation of myself remained just persistent enough that I made the choice to call my sister-in-law and spontaneously met her in Queen Anne, where she was running errands. The kids found a toy store and spent time at the train table and then we went to a tea store so Wendi could buy tea and I spent time watching the kids jolt all those quiet, tea-drinking and laptop-typing types out of their ordinary afternoon. And then to an Indian restaurant for a buffet lunch and lastly, out in the darkening skies to watch the kids run around an urban expanse of pea gravel, ginko trees, and wooden planks (a cool, little urban park).

I'm thankful anyway, because my introversion and shutting down turned me outward toward life and family and sidewalks and stores, and we came home refreshed. Mica slept and Orlando and I played and he told me he was a baby and crawled into my arms and I carried him with ease.